PEOPLE DO NOT CHANGE


I'm hurt. I don't know what's happening with us. I don't know if we're still together or not. Is this how you break up? Just lose all communications whatsoever? If it is, then I must say that this is too immature. I just wish you'd stand up, be a man and tell it exactly to my face. Yes, I'd still be hurt, but then I would have closure. both of us will.

Aren't you the one who said that for a relationship to last, one must have achieved closure from one's past relationships? Yes, I vividly remember you saying that, or was it all just talk? That you never meant a thing you've said to me? That, as what others have been telling me, you were just using me? But I did not listen to them, which I very much regret now. I used to think that all people, whatever their position, religion, or status in life is, have this innate goodness in them; that they could change given the right circumstances and motivation.

I now know that what I used to believe in, is just plain crap, thanks to you. You‚ve opened up my eyes. People DO NOT change, and never will, just like leopards can never change their spots. YOU could never change, even if you say you have. I don't see it, I don't feel it. You've really dragged me down, to depths of depression I never knew existed. I've never felt this weak, this helpless in my life. But I know that I could rise again. I know that this is just another crossroad for me, and a game for you. Speaking of which, I'd give you bonus points for that. You made me believe everything you‚ve said, and made me do everything you've wanted.

Tell me, was I worth the challenge you've won? Was I worth made fun of, and used? I hope you got the satisfaction you‚ve wanted out of me. But I just wish I've listened to my friends, these people who do care about me, sooner.

Knowing you, I know that you wouldn't read this letter till the end. I think that by now, you would have deleted this already. But I don't mind. I'm not doing this for you anyway. I'‚m doing this for me. Since I know that you would never give me the satisfaction of a closure from our relationship, I guess this is my way of achieving such.

Today, I'm setting myself free. Free from you - free from your self-centeredness - free from your cruelty. Today, I will try to find myself again. And today, I have learned a very valuable lesson when it comes to relationships - I learned to love me first, not to love fully nor to give everything in a relationship. I hope you've learned something too. I hope that you wouldn't treat other women the way you've treated me.

So this is goodbye, thanks for the memories we both shared, and for lessons I have learned thru you.



the love letter collection
submitted 10:58 AM EST
friday, september 26, 2008