HOW ARE YOU DOING?"
[This is not a love letter, but more of a "like" letter.]
I don't know why I still ponder over why things didn't work out between
us. When we first met, I didn't really think much about us because I wasn't
physically attracted to you. As days passed and we started to speak more,
my feelings began to develop for you. I thought the feelings were mutual.
You suggested that we should grab a drink after work one day and I agreed,
but you never stepped up to the plate. I don't understand why you backed
out after you got my number. Was I just another girl-toy? If you weren't
interested, why in the world would you ask me for my number and leave
me hanging? It's been a month since you've gotten my number, but nothing
has happened. I was weak and sad for the first two weeks, but I've gotten
so much stronger. The feelings that I had towards you have faded, but
the wondering will never end. I want you to tell me why...why did you
ask me for my number and never call? What did you not like about me and
What kills me inside is that I see you every day and you're always so
nice to me. Why do you even bother to drop by my office every day to say
hi if you're not into me? Don't lead me on if you're not interested because
that'll make me feel worse. A big part of me has forgotten about you,
but that other part is still sad and wondering why.
A few weeks ago, I speculated that you may be gay because my friend works
out at your gym and he's convinced that you're either bi-sexual or gay.
I denied that at first, but it kinda made sense. You have a stylist (I
don't even have one), you dress in tight clothing, you dye your hair,
and your walk is different from straight guys. Maybe I'm trying to convince
myself that you're gay, so that I can feel better. I know that's wrong
of me, but what you're doing is WRONG.
For the past week, I've been trying to avoid talking to you because I
don't want to wonder anymore. We use to have short conversations every
day, but now, it's more of a, "Hi, how are you doing?" I think
that you are cutting it short too. Only you know why you do what you do.
All I can do is sit and wonder...but I'm sick of wondering about whether
it's because of the age difference or because of my looks or because you've
met someone else or because you're gay or because you're a dog or because
you lost my number and you're afraid to ask again.
I was sad when I found out that your company was moving out, but a part
of me is glad. Although I enjoy your company, I'd rather you move away.
It'll help me forget about you. In a few weeks, I hope that I'll be completely
over you. But a part of me still hopes that you will fess up and say that
you have feelings for me.
the love letter