Heyas _____,

Good morning, good afternoon, whnever you read this at... it's 1:30 am here and I was watching The Simpsons, looking over you at you sleeping. You seem so so so so content and happy. I'm so glad you mustarded up the courage and strength to come over yesterday afternoon and we could talk things over and get things straightened out, it means a lot to me, and I can only imagine to yourself as well. It's a lot easier to discuss things in person when there are so many variables and questions to have immediate answers to, that any other form, like writing seems to pale in comparison.

I want you to be happy more than anything. Happy where ever you are and with whoever you are with, that is the prime essence of being with anyone, happiness. You mentioned that you went out on a date Friday night, and you know, that's fine with me, I understand why. You have to satiate your curious nature, and in the process, finding out what you want and need, as well as what you have to offer. Dating is never perfect and it's so flattering hearing you tell me about how no one compares to me... it's a very special feeling to be praised so highly. When I think about you and how you compare to my experiences with women I have met, I feel the same way, no one seems to match all of the qualities you possess, or the quantity.

You are so complex, yet so simple. So caring, yet so playful. I could go on and on, but the amount of words would simply become overwhelming. It would be soooo easy to let myself go and fall in love, but without a few trials and tribulations along the way, like the Friday message forcing a confrontation to discuss matters, it could just make matters worse later on. Finding out who we both are, takes patience and a lot of time, and managing through the little things is part of being able to handle the bigger stuff, that always ends up appearing in life.

I was really really really happy to be able to make you to dinner last night and take you to a movie, you don't know how badly I wanted to be able to do that, since I first met you. It was hard for me to open up about all of this right away, not knowing if it was going to matter, not really expecting too much to happen past the second or third date. I knew when we first met, you were something from the other 'side of the tracks'.... you were so smart, well spoken, well traveled, impeccable cander, how could I not be spellbound?

Then finding out that you were just as impressed with me... I thought, it must just be a bad-boy infatuation thing, like Camaro guy... forget his name, lol, and it won't last long I'm sure. In the past few weeks though, you have given me so much confidence and strength emotionally, you can't begin to imagine. You have been the catalyst and the witness to much of it, you probably can tell by just in the way I behave around you, and the way I talk with you so bluntly and openly. It's mind boggling to begin to express how rare and exotic that feeling is to experience with someone after such a short period of time.

Just looked in on you and you opened your eyes, looked at me and smiled, closed your eyes and went back to sleep... cute + 1... I guess that is one the little things that I appreciate the most about you _____... you are always happy to see me.

I probably shouldn't stay up too much later here, already past 2:30 now... I just thought that I would write you and let you know how I felt, and share my world with you, from my perspective. I've never been overly prolific at writing long verse letters like this, but last 4 months, have aged and wisened me dramatically, almost forcing me to express myself without hesistation, a quality I have never held before, and so deeply. A quality that many take for granted, yet is so crucial to a healthy mental existence.

I like sharing my experiences and knowledge with you, I know already you have taught me a lot, and I know you have much more to share with me. I look forward to the adventure ahead, even though the destination and path are not plainly obvious to either of us at the moment to see. You are special _____, very special. tIme for bed... it's 3 am lol... going to seek seek you out from under the sheets of my bed /wink

_____ xo

[submitted 05/24/03]