It has taken me a while to clear my head, to find the space I've needed to concentrate on writing you.

My past few months have been filled with chaos, an unfocused nervous energy that has left me without the peace I had hoped for. I thought I'd be able to concentrate on my work, left alone by "reality" or daily troubles. But I've found I just fill it with nothing. Not working has left me idle and somewhat bored.

....

I do miss you, and I think of you often. It is a dilemma in some respects because I know things must be this way for now. I know you have a life flowing ahead, and much to accomplish. I just wish, hope we find a peace amongst our lives.

So much pain and undue anguish has been caused on my part, and I believe now, it is time for you - a time for your self without me, a time for you to explore yourself and your boundaries without my sometimes selfish input.

There is no one else that has become a larger part of my life than you.

I will be, and hope to be in some way, always affected by your presence and the warmth of your genuine love and care. I cannot - and I tried to find a peace about it - fully exorcise myself away from you. What I mean is, I know we must separate and find the perspective needed, but I pray we are able to communicate on some level. There is something within me that desires a true sense of communication without the pain of the past. I've truly tried to separate myself away from the pain and take responsibility. I hope that with our communication now you can sense me taking that responsibility. You have had a large part in my self-realizations, a positive part, and can only try to accept the results.

I do miss you and hope things are going well.

My Love,

[submitted 04/09/02]